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"Bev made an incredible difference in my life"

Are you looking for a collection of poems that gives voice to your
deep pain?

Do you need a safe, gentle way to heal the deep places in your heart?

Poetry has a special way of entering and healing the hidden parts of your wounded soul.

You will feel deeply understood
at the core of your being.


Grieving is one of the most difficult experiences anyone has to endure.

Poetry can be an incredible way
to be present to the deepest
places of your soul.

“Poems and Prayers of the Grieving Heart”

A book of poems that was born out of the grieving process of someone who has been there.

Sometimes there are things in our souls that need healing that we are not even aware of; that we cannot even name on a conscious level.

We only know that healing is so desperately needed deep within us. The depths of our grieving souls cry for understanding and for healing for the very core of our being.

Impact poetry has a special way of reaching into our depths to gently heal those scars and wounds hidden deep within our souls...the deep deep scars left from the visit death has made into our souls.

I offer these poems that birthed out of my grieving process and my pain, to your soul for your healing and blessing.

“Openings and Closings” speaks to the depths of pain found on a journey of grief.

This book makes available to you:

* companionship and hope for the weary grieving soul.

* deep truths tucked in amongst the regular and
   ordinary experiences of a family

* encouragement to keep on breathing
   and stepping your way to healing

* ways to put words to the craziness
   of this deeply painful soul journey

* ways to normalize feelings that at times just feel crazy

* encouragement of how not to stay victim to death

* ways to even see the gifts in the grieving journey

* permission to feel and to laugh and to dance.

May you find some care for your grieving, hurting heart and soul within these words.  May you feel love, comfort and hope.

From: Bev Swanson
Fri Nov 19th, 7:39 PM

Dear Friends and Fellow Hurting Souls.

These poems could never have been written in the way they were before we found ourselves tossed in the very deep, deep ocean of grief. Up until a few years ago, I had travelled many a sad and lonely grieving path with friends; also with clients as their therapist. I knew how deeply they hurt, BUT...

Only when I found myself in their shoes did I so deeply GET just how deep this pain ran. When our little daughter died very whole world just fell apart right before my eyes. (this story can be found in another book referenced often in my monthly Grief Connection Letter that you can subscribe to at the top of this page.)

[Now I am the one needing the help]

Instead of being the strong one who was there for others. I found myself grappling with these same painful realities in my own experience. Now it was I, who was standing by a grave. I was planning a service and feeling that dreadful aching hole in my soul.

That dreadful aching hole at that time did not seem possible to ever move past. Now I understood at a whole other level why the anger and the waves of feelings were so intense. Now I KNEW why people just sat and wailed and wailed. Not that I was insensitive to it before. Before, I could only imagine that kind of pain, now I knew it.


I looked to the sky for some sign of hope
the clouds rolled in
embracing my pain into tears

I looked to the sky
the stars winked at me
almost as though you were trying to find me
leaving me in the lonely moment of how far away you feel

I looked to the sky and the sun broke through my pain
for but a moment
a kiss from my maker

I looked to the sky at the Northern Lights
as they danced in the presence of you
the aura of your presence
painting my soul in beauty and light
a moment of us
where the worlds join us together.

I looked to the sky and the rain came down
mingled with my tears
my "Healer" crying with me
weeping and crying in the vastness of my grief
tears mingled with yours in the rain

I looked to the sky...a rainbow appeared
of every color
a personal promise
that when my tears hold less pain
one day
my pain will transform into color
when I will be ok again
yet even now
I am ok

I look to the sky
from where my help comes

[How this book came to be]

This book of poetry was bubbling within me for quite some time without my knowledge. First I wanted to share our story and experiences in a book to help others. This became complete when I birthed the book, "Wide my Ocean, Deep my Grief" (more details are often found in my monthly Grief Connection Letter).

However, writing a book of poems to share with others was NEVER on my agenda. As you know when we are relaxed and open, often the best stuff comes to the surface. It is often only when looking back can we see evidence that someone else has a bigger plan that we were not privy to, at the time.

As my other book was being written, I found myself using a lot of poetry to bring the point across. One thing led to another and before I knew it I had taken out my journal and just started writing poetry on our grieving space. I found myself once again visiting parts of our healing journey on paper for the purpose of sharing it with you; yet using a whole other medium - poetry.

When reading these poems to a couple of grieving friends, they found it so helpful. The poetry continued to flow out of me and has now become a book of 23 poems ready to share with others.

To my surprise and utter delight...I realized that I love writing poetry. Many have told me that I am naturally quite good at poetry, so certainly this collection was very inspired.


It is my hope that these poems will give words to your feelings. When you are open, your feelings can be freed from being trapped in your experiences. Others who are living the same deep pain will not feel so alone. You will see some hope in your process.

Some of the truths that we learned I am forever grateful for. These truths are now available to help another soul with their grieving. Last but not least, I wish to encourage you, the reader.
Make the strong choice to move directly into your pain, so you can heal and one day choose to dance.


We heard those words often ringing in our ears after our little one left us. The words "I hope you dance", were heard in the song by Leeanne Womach. We could just hear our little Jayde speaking to us through them.

We are all reminded not to just lie down and die; but to choose to step back into life when we were ready and even dance.

This message is so profoundly important to all of us. I wish to share that call with you in the form of poetry.

This is the call to stop being a victim to death and loss. You can face it squarely and find the hidden nuggets of gold deep within the process.


These poems reflect our stories and struggles. Woven in and amongst the words are the deep feelings, (sometimes hopeless) "missings", longings, and pain that we experienced and still feel deeply sometimes.

The poems reflect the constant challenge we felt we were being faced with. which was to head directly into our pain. Being in our pain one breath at a time would allow us to heal. So I have INCLUDED before each poem a bit of information about how that particular learning came to be or how those thoughts were born.


At the end of each poem is a very brief prayer. This is a prayer of the heart, left rather open so that each of us can choose to direct this prayer to God or to their Higher Power in whatever way we are most comfortable with.

I do find that grieving has a way of bringing people to their knees with "prayer cries" way to deep for words sometimes. That was certainly the case for me. If the word, prayer, is problem for you...just think of the prayers as laments.


These poems have been written mostly for you who are deeply hurting and grieving.

However I know that if you are journeying with someone who is in this place; they will speak to you too. You will be helped to better understand your companion who grieves.

These poems are giving words to the process we have been in over the past two to three years. The result is that these words have made me extremely thankful for the gifts I received during these tough travels.

A SPECIAL point was made to include a poem here for the folks who grieve an unborn or very young baby. This type of grieving is so deep but sometimes not even recognized as valid.

Your grief is valid even if your child never saw the light of this world because they did see the light of you. I know that your pain is very do I know...because I am one of you too.


This is a really liberating experience to take a life experience and put words to it...especially in the form of poetry. I found myself remembering and feeling those painful feelings once again, but that is a good thing for all of us to do at times. This book of poetry has also served to be a healing force for yet another layer of my grief journey.


The best learning I have ever experienced on grieving comes from living it. In addition, I have walked this journey with so many other people. So these poems reflect a bit of the journey of many of you whom I have walked closely with and cried with as we considered your loss.

Therefore these poems are a part of the experiences of many, many grieving souls. When writing them I thought of so many of you and how you experienced this healing and tearing pain. I hope you will see how I captured just a bit of how things are for you as well.

A Testimonial from a Grieving Soul

Hi, my name is Patricia and my dear husband died almost two years ago from cancer.
My loss has changed me forever.

I have been extremely blessed to live in a community of caring friends and have drawn on the support of these people frequently. Among those people is a former colleague of my husband and now a dear friend of mine, Bev Swanson.

Since she had experienced the devastating loss of her infant daughter the year before she quickly identified with my grief. She knew, I mean really knew how I was feeling. She also grieved the loss of her friend and colleague when my husband died.

I felt so safe with her. I journeyed with her these past several months as she prepared to make her two books available on her web site. I have both books. I never knew someone could write with so much understanding and compassion. Much of what she expressed mirrored so much of what I was dealing with.

There is still so much mystery around why her Jayde and my Hal had to leave us, but we don't always have to know the answers. There is much sacredness and peace in that...

I am truly blessed,


These poems are about loneliness and missing. They are about visiting the grave and feeling the void and emptiness. They are about relationships and loving and losing all wrapped into one. The poems are about tripping and falling and about getting up again and choosing to put one step before the other.

The poems are about choosing to heal. They are about both "making sense of..." and "not making sense of..." They are about choosing and being stubborn. These are poems about opening and closing. They are about dying and they are about dancing.


Have you ever noticed how a good poem can put words to feelings and experiences better than anything else sometimes. This is especially so when we are hurting. Sometimes we cannot find the words to put to what is going on inside of us. Then someone comes out with a poem and we can at last say, "THERE IT IS! THAT'S HOW I FEEL". "FINALLY SOMEBODY GETS THIS...SOMEBODY UNDERSTANDS!"

image of book, titled Openings and Closings


To give you a sense of the poems in this book, I will list the titles for you.

These titles do not need much explanation for you who are in the grieving place because even the words in the titles will likely speak to where you are at.

I know that each of you has so much inside that you could write a book on each of these topics.

In some ways the words in these titles pretty much sum up the grieving process. They say so much of what is flying through our heads so often.
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The Titles of the 23 Poems Follow:

“ Openings and Closings ”
      Life is so full of openings and closings. In death there are also both.
       We opening to grieving, closing to having our loved one with us.
       Opening to letting go... Opening to moving on...
       Closing to what was, opening to what is...

“ Into My Open Space ”
      Our lost loved ones leave us with a lot of pain.
       Opening after such a loss is so very difficult.
       Yet when we do allow just a bit of opening;
       we often find what moves into that space to be such a gift...
       even when the opening is very tiny at first.

“ Seasons of Missing You ”
      Seasons are always a reminder of what used to be and
       a bold reminder of what no longer is.
       Sometimes they comfort. Other times leave a void in the soul.
       Almost always find us missing our precious loved one who has left.

“ Some Days I Wonder ”
      Death leaves us pondering and wondering about
       the things that we will never know this side of heaven.
       This poem is about those questions that sometimes come through our minds.

“ The Sacred Ground ”
      This poem is about the comfort that is sometimes found at the cemetery
       It also speaks to the aching loss that becomes so evident there.

“ I'll Always Wish ”
      Death brings with it so much empty "missing". We find ourselves wishing
       we could have back all the things we lost through our loss.
       We wish for things to just be as they were and would be.

“ Our Gift ”
      This poem was written for our little baby, Jayde.
       It is here I put words to the gift she was and is to us...our ongoing gift.

“ Live Life Large ”
      The challenge after a deep loss to choose to live into the pain and
       live into our loss so that we can live the life we have here to the full.

“ So Little Time ”
      A poem written for two dear friends of mine.
       They had a love so deep...a soul-mate relationship.
       They had so little time together. I honour their love in this poem.

“ Into My Stable ”
      Christmas can be one of the most difficult seasons for the grieving soul.
       The "healer of our soul" wants to come and love us to the depths of our pain.

“ Healing Breath ”
      Sometimes when we are grieving all we can do is breathe our way
       to the next breath and trust that each breath brings us closer to our healing.
       It most certainly does.

“ Keep on Dancing ”
      Dedicated to our Jayde who we felt was telling us to "dance" instead of die.

“ The Void Of You ”
      Death leaves such a void.
       Even after much healing this void remains - the void of our loved one.
       I have discovered that this void is necessary and even a gift.
       This poem speaks to the void of death and
       it's gift to us should we choose to open it.

“ To Die or To Dance ”
      After someone precious dies a choice is quickly before us.
       Do we allow this death to take us out and leave us empty and cold.
       Or do we choose to enter into our pain and
       dance our mourning so we can dance into the light once again?

“ Letting it Unfold ”
      Sometimes when someone dies or we experience a loss it is very difficult
       to see what might be next in our lives. I found that just trusting that
       it will unfold helps one to just "Be" in the unfolding of the days.
       Low and unfolds in ways we could not imagine...even in good ways.

“ I Never Got to Love You ”
      A poem written for women who have lost their little ones even
       before they are born. The loss of never meeting your child
       face to face is so deep. The loss of all the "never-got-to's" are spoken of here.
       This beautiful and poignant poem validates the experience of miscarriage and
       the tremendous loss of a precious child in it.

“ My Little Sister ”
      This is a playful poem written for our son who
       must have had many strange thoughts after the death of his sister.
       Because he is a special needs child and struggles with speech, we could
       only imagine what he may be thinking and feeling about his baby sister.

“ Doubly Blest ”
      This poem too is about our son, Brendyn. I wrote this poem to
       express the pain and loss that parents with a special needs child
       may experience after the diagnosis that something is very different.
       The child that they "expect" has to die so that the child they "have" is
       free to be all they can be. This is a profound grieving process for them.

“ I Think That I'm Forgetting ”
      One of the saddest parts of the grieving process is when
       we start to forget the face of the person we lost.
       Sometimes we find ourselves not thinking of them as often, so our grief
       takes on a different form. In this poem there is comfort that although
       we may forget their face, our soul never ever can forget them.

“ The Paradox ”
      This poem speaks to the harsh realities of life. Joy and Sorrow become
       such an important and profound paradox when they come together.
       This poem speaks to this dilemma that we are all faced with.

“ I'm Making Space ”
      In such a busy world where we would like to keep busy and
       run away from our becomes easy to just brush off our losses.
       However it is so crucial that we take the time we need to grieve and
       to be centred. This poem speaks to the importance of this.

“ The Prayer Dance ”
      An invitation from our maker to enter into the dance of mourning
       so as to heal and be able to dance your way into the dance of life and joy.
       This is choice, although not a very easy one at times.

“ Closing the Healer of the Soul ”
      A lament of the soul to God about the pain of grief.

“ Come Dance With Me... ”
      A call from our healer, to our soul, to live.


My feelings now I open
to you my fellow friends
to walk these healing paths together
and try our hearts to mend.

It�s hard to put into some words
the feelings that we feel
For one day they are normal
the next they�re just not real

And so I put my deep, deep pain
into the words of grieving
so you my friend be understood
and find yourself believing

that healing can for surely come to you
in spite of your deep pain
and one day you find yourself
to be dancing once again.


We have decide to choose to open once again to what this life has for us and to dance. This decision came after and with a great deal of pain and tears...but I am so glad we decided. I doubt I would be writing here if this had not been the case for us.

One of the biggest blessings for our family of opening to the dance of life was the home-coming of our beautiful Haitian daughter, through the miracle of adoption. She can never replace the child we lost...but she has brought so many gifts of her own. We can say it is so worth the work to step into your pain, to heal and to open once again.



As I tried to decide what to charge for a book of this nature I realized that it is really very important to me that no one miss out on the chance to read it  because the cost is too high.

Many people cannot afford an hour of private counselling at upwards of $90 per hour. 

Therefore I have decided to discount the purchase of this
"healing  book of poems" down to only $19.97!


Along with the purchase of this poem book, I am including 4 special gifts for you to help you further in your process.

I have compiled some of the following thoughts and ideas to further help you cope with the grieving process.

These are four areas that are very important to the healing process and are often areas people find themselves struggling in. May they also be of help to you.

With this book you will receive a LIST OF RESOURCES that we and others found especially helpful in our process of grieving. There are books, songs and resources in this collection. This is a growing collection so as more good books come to me...I will mention them in my monthly Grief Connection Letter so that your collection will grow as well.

I offer you a special extra present of a small gift book called MY MAKER'S GIFTS
(Whispers from nature for the grieving soul).
This is a special collection of messages and sayings that come from nature. I have found that when I am out in nature my soul is ministered in ways I cannot find anywhere else. My grieving process was no different. This book is light and easy to read and brings some profound truths to you through natures way of being. This little book begins with a poem called, My Maker�s Hand.

I would like to provide for you with this article called, MISCARRIAGE MISSED
(Struggles with the painful loss of miscarriage - the silent loss).
So many of us have suffered through the often unnoticed loss of an unborn child. What is this process like for people? How does one grieve without a place to go? What are some ways to honour this wee one whom you never got to meet in person? These are just some of these questions addressed in this article. Along with these thoughts it is my hope that you who have experienced this pain may feel some understanding and validation for your experience.

Last but not least...I have compiled some GENTLE AND COMMON UNDERSTANDINGS about the grieving process. These are things I and others around me have learned are helpful to remember when grieving.. They are summarized in this compilation so are easy to read and refer to when you need.


Should you find this book not to be helpful in your process at all or not to your expectation; I offer you a complete 100% money back guarantee for a full 90 days.  My only request is that you give me some idea of how I might have been better able to help you.

Remember no matter what the 4 FREE Gifts are yours to keep, as my way to encourage you.

May you find peace in your storm and a way through the dark moments. May you find ways to travel with others in their stormy moments.

carefully follow the directions order to purchase it.

For your healing journey,
Bev Swanson
Pastoral Counselor/Teacher

If you feel that this e-book may be of help to your process you may order by
clicking on this secure order button......

It is very possible for you to purchase by check or international money order, made out to myself, Bev Swanson.

In order to do this, you will need to send the check or international money order for
$19.97 USD along with your name, address, email address and phone number printed clearly to the address below:

Attn: Bev Swanson
Wide My Ocean Deep My Grief
PO Box 1118
Camrose, AB T4V 4E7

Upon receiving the order by mail, we will immediately email the details you need to download and read this e-book. This is why we need your email address printed clearly and your phone number just in case we have problems emailing the e-book download information to you.

Remember to avoid the delays of mailing the check or international money order, just click the button above to order securely on-line by credit card with complete security.



Grieving is one of the most difficult experiences anyone has to endure.

Poetry can be the best way to understand these deep places of the soul.

“Poems and Prayers of the Grieving Heart”

A book of poems that was born out of the grieving process of someone who has been there.

“Openings and Closings” speaks to the depths of pain found on a journey of grief.

A book of poems that provides you with:

* companionship and hope for the weary grieving soul.

* deep truths tucked in amongst the regular and
   ordinary experiences of a family

* encouragement to keep on breathing
   and stepping your way to healing

* ways to put words to the craziness
   of this deeply painful soul journey

* ways to normalize feelings that at times just feel crazy

* encouragement of how not to stay victim to death

* ways to even see the gifts in the grieving journey

* permission to feel and to laugh and to dance.

May you find some care for your grieving, hurting heart and soul within these words.  May you feel love, comfort and hope.


If you are reading this book of poems and are walking with a grieving friend or relative...I wish you grace as you journey gently with them. May these poems make you a better companion.

If you are reading this book as a professional seeking tools to assist your clients to express themselves to a deeper level; may reflecting on these poems aid you to be present in the best way possible during such difficult times.

If you are reading this book of poems in the midst of a deep ocean of grief; it is my deepest wish that you find peace, comfort and hope for your wounded soul amongst these poems.  May you find expression for the deep emotions trapped inside.   Blessings on you as you journey through these difficult days toward your healing.

If we dare to notice, we are part of an aging society; unfortunately it is only a matter of time before you will appreciate the support and company shared within this book.  If not yet, then unfortunately soon, either you or someone you care about will appreciate poems on grieving that speak to your heart.

“Poems and Prayers of the Grieving Heart”

“Good Company in the depths of pain during a journey of grief”

Click here to order this e-book with complete security

Copyright © 2004 All Rights Reserved Bev Swanson